Green Eye (a brief elaboration)

Today’s napowrimo.net prompt is to translate a poem. My Day #30 poem can be found here. I wanted to fix it up a bit more, however, as it felt incomplete. So—bonus round!—here is a somewhat more polished version, in which I worry less about preserving the exact meaning of the original. It’s not an out-and-out rewrite (even though I added an extra verse/stanza), so I am choosing to think of it more as a brief elaboration…
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