National Poetry Writing Month 2021, Day 19: I’ll just have to try to get a few thousand more miles out of the existing parts

My Day 19 poem is my response to the prompt, which is to write a humorous rant.

A comedian once said—
and I must agree—
that it would be great
if we could take body parts
back to Sears
to exchange them for ones
that work properly.

The example he gave
was the one arm that can throw
objects long distances,
whereas the other one
can manage only a few feet.

As one of my teachers used to say.
that’s just poor design!

What if we could exchange
defective and worn-out body parts
at Sears?

My list of parts is growing,
from the eyes that get worse
eleven months before my annual exam,
to the shoulder that works just fine
every third day,
to the knee that clearly aspires
to something nefarious.

And that’s not counting
the little things showing up today
that weren’t there yesterday,
or the routine maintenance checks
pointing to numbers slightly out of spec.

So, I’ve got my shopping list
and would gladly make the trip today,
but for one teeny tiny little detail:

no more Sears.

(19 April 2021)




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